Description: I want every one to wear life jackets for me because I don't like people drowning. I'm convincing you to wear a life jacket.
I was in a kayak on Tuesday. I thought I was going to fall out of the kayak, but I did not. I had a life jacket on. I felt fantastic because I did not fall out.
I want everyone to wear life jackets because they will save you from drowning. Life jackets make you float. Life jackets have air in them because it can save your life. I zipped my zip and clicked my life jacket tight.
Feedback:I like the way you have some juicy words.
Feedforward:next time I think you can start with a middle and end.
Evaluation:I learnt to wear a life jacket in kayaks.